My break in Hawaii and a thing or two about child psychiatry

How to start when I've been gone for so long? Or... almost three months... not even... not that long, but still having been 2-3 months inside my own head and my own little bubbly world. I wrote that I might go for a break in Hawaii, but didn't think I would actually be mostly off social media and news for that whole time, reducing e-mailing to as few as possible... but it kind of naturally happened. And surprisingly I almost forgot I had a blog, and just in general forgot much about what was going on outside Kona.


It's been really good to have a break, to be on my own and feel like I'm away from the busyness of the world. I'm actually going home to Norway not knowing much about what people have been up to while I've been gone, and am excited to get all the updates! In this little bubble I've also had lots of time to read, think and listen to music and just be. I've been reading all four gospels in the Bible (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) and just been fascinated with Jesus and who he was and is, wanting to learn so much more... 

Well, it's been ups and downs, mostly ups, and very inwardly focused, obsessing over my master thesis and going to cafes to write; one out on a lanai where you can watch the sun set, another one on the ocean, seeing the waves crash and sometimes feeling them, and a various others to not get bored. I've written around 90 pages, with maybe 70ish worth keeping, and have 20-30 more to write. Writing my thesis has been a ride, with lots of frustrations and emotions, getting it out on my professor on Skype every few weeks, hearing how she understands, and that I'm totally doing fine: "Just keep going. You're doing fine!" My research material is close to 150 pages, in-depth interviews with children who have come from North Korea to South Korea, and tons of observation and reflection notes not to mention the discussions with volunteers at the center I researched. It's been so intense and emotional to almost live in these 150 pages, to know my own material, to see the faces of these children in my dreams and hear their voices in my head every day. I've been thinking of them a lot and wondering how they are doing now, longing to see them again.

While writing about children I've also read a book by the known child psychiatrist and brain specialist Doctor Bruce Perry The boy who was raised as a dog. The book is amazing!! It talks about psychiatry and child development in a way I have never heard before! It is basically a book about traumatized children, and how the doctor has treated them, from the survivors of the David Koresh Waco cult in Texas in the 90's to a young adult imprisoned for rape and murder at 18, along with many stories about children from orphanages and foster homes. Added to the story he explains how the brain works, is developed (especially during (the pregnancy of course and then) the three first years), how sight is developed at one certain time, how physical touch is most important in another, how attachment is formed, our ability to coordinate... the right brain... the left brain.... how music affects the brain... I'm no 'brainist', but it makes so much sense, also the affects it can have if not given enough stimulation, love, affection, time with mother, father and caregivers and it has made me even more determined about guarding the first years of a child's life with passion. Someone please read it at home, so we can discuss it!!!

Gosh, this entry is so random. I'm sorry. Maybe I should have had a longer break so I would have had more to tell, but that's kind of how my life has been the last months - drinking coffee, wandering from cafe to cafe, writing about these kids and their experiences and learning about the brain!! And me who's never really been interested in children, it's always been about youth or adults, am suddenly so fascinated and intrigued by who they are and what makes them who they are!

Well... on Monday I get on a plane and am going home to Norway to celebrate Christmas, see everyone, hopefully also some snow and finish my master!! I'm really excited to meet people, might be home for a while, and want to meet as many as possible, often! Sorry this random blogpost!